Because I commute, I listen to a lot of podcasts. I heard one around Christmastime that brought a smile to my face, not only because of the legacy of the episode’s inspiration, but because of the whole-hearted belief necessary to bring it about. The podcast is The Way I Heard It by Mike Rowe, episode 120: “30 Minutes of Disappointing Television” (30 Minutes of Disappointing TV). Spoiler Alert: if you want to watch/ listen to the podcast, do it now because I’m going to talk all about it here!
There is probably no one out there reading this who hasn’t seen A Charlie Brown Christmas. Vince Guaraldi’s soundtrack has become a classic Christmas favorite (it’s also the ringtone on my phone), and the story Mike tells is about Charles Schulz’s determination to bring it to life. In 1965, Peanuts was a powerhouse comic strip and CBS has signed with its creator Sparky (as his friends knew him) to make a serious of television specials, but he had retained creative control. Nothing was going on tv without his approval. He’d cast children to do the voices, met with Guaraldi regarding the music and once it was ready, the executives at CBS sat down to screen the special prior to its airing. The title of Mike’s episode clearly reflects their opinion of it, and if it had been up to them, it would have been thrown out. But since the network had already made commitments and there wasn’t time to argue with good ol’ Sparky, they had to air the special as he created it.
The reason CBS still runs his special every year (along with the others) is that Sparky had faith in himself and his creation. If it had been up to the CBS suits, no one would have ever seen it. There are some who would simply say that Schulz knew his audience well, believing that fans of the books and comic strip would tune it to watch it and those numbers alone would ensure its success. That’s true enough but in order to get that far, he had to believe in himself and have the determination to see it through, despite everyone telling him that he’s wrong.
Most of us give up on weight loss because we lose faith in ourselves. We just don’t believe that we can change our bad habits. We give up when it gets hard because we either tell ourselves “it’s too hard” or that “we can’t change.” It’s not that we don’t want to lose weight: it’s that, deep down inside, we don’t believe we are strong enough to do it. We don’t believe we have the resources, the stamina, the will to change. However you want to characterize it, we just don’t believe in ourselves. Some of us may feel that’s a harsh statement, but think about it: when we have faith in something, we follow through with it to the end, even when everyone else is telling us we are wrong.
A lot of times, these doubts come from being unfamiliar with a situation or knowing that it is not your forte. Remember the last time you tried to do something you had never done before? Remember reading the instructions, looking at the diagrams, feeling confused? Am I doing this right? Why isn’t it working? I must be doing something wrong! I have a lot of experience with that feeling!
Several years ago, I had a very old television with a VCR (for you millenials who’ve no idea what that is, it’s what us old people used to record tv before DVRs!) I had just gotten a cable box because the tv was seriously ancient and in order to hook up the tv, VCR and cable box, I needed an adapter box. It was basically a junction where all the cables came in and went back out to the various devices, and according to the instructions, it was easy to set up. Cable comes in from the wall, into the adapter, goes out to the VCR, back into the box, back out to the tv, etc.! No fuss, no muss….right? OH HELL NO! After setting it up according to the instructions, it didn’t work! tried hooking it up several different ways without success and I finally called my cable company who told me “try this, try that, try another way.” Finally, after three hours of constant reconfiguring, I realized something must be broken and it must be the adapter box, since everything had been working beforehand. I returned the adapter box, came home with another one, and in under ten minutes, had it hooked up the way I had originally done it and everything worked just fine! In fact, I had done it right the first time, but because I didn’t trust that I had done it correctly, I spent most of the day and whole lot of frustrations.
Oddly enough, you would have thought I felt more confident afterwards since I figured it out (eventually) on my own and it hadn’t been my error that was the problem, but in fact, I was kind of embarrassed that it had taken me all day to figure it out! While there are a lot of things I am good at doing, electronics isn’t one of them, so when it comes to setting up or trouble-shooting hardware especially, I get that Deer in the Headlights feeling!
It’s easy to let doubts creep in. For a lot of us, while we may be strong when it comes to our jobs or other endeavors in our lives, it’s not uncommon for us to let others influence us when it comes to our weight or our fitness. If we’ve been overweight all our lives (raising my hand here!), we’ve already got it in our heads that “I’m not good at controlling my eating” or “I’ve never been good at working out.” That often stems from the idea that “I’m not doing this right!,” whether that’s eating healthy, controlling emotional eating or working out. It’s not that we’re weak or easily influenced: it’s that we aren’t sure of ourselves!
Usually, situations that make us feel very stressed and a little panicky are when we begin to doubt our abilities. Weight loss is one of those situations that looks like it’s easy, and in some ways it is, but not if we don’t have faith in ourselves! It’s a lot like that Bible parable about building your house on sand vs. building it on a solid foundation. Obviously, if your self confidence is shaky, your ‘house’ isn’t going to last very long! I admit, I am not a big fan of positive affirmations, but reminding yourself “I can do this!” on a regular basis goes a long way to turning that sandy foundation into stone. This has a lot in common with that Strategic Pause I recently mentioned in a previous post: when we feel that Deer in the Headlights panicky feeling, take a deep calming breath and remind ourselves “I got this!” I know there are people who are going to roll their eyes or say “what happens when I screw it up?” Making a wrong choice isn’t the end of the world or your weight loss! (Another important reminder!) If we make a wrong choice, we will eventually figure it out but The Most Important Step is that we don’t give up on ourselves! It takes practice and it takes faith in our own abilities. The more we keep moving forward, the more we learn and the more faith we have in ourselves and our ability to succeed! There will always be that little voice that asks “what if I can’t do it?” and when it does, your answer needs to be “giving up guarantees that I can’t do this!” So enter our little reminder: Don’t give up! You can do this!